SHAMED BEFORE THE LORD (SBTL)

I think a lot in my own head.  I think about various people, I pray for those on my prayer list and sometimes I just think about life in general.    Lately, I’ve been pushing through some rough thoughts about what I see happening around me. 

I began asking the Lord to show me what I needed to know about these circumstances that were pressing in on my mind so.  I made some calls and exchanged some chats with my trusted confidants to see what they’d been observing/hearing/feeling – just to double check myself.  The feedback wasn’t comforting as we discussed just a few of the things going on in the news – I hadn’t even taken those things into my considerations. 

My considerations even began to wear on me in my sleep (and if you know me – I believe in sleeping the sleep and not anything disrupting that).  I ran and ran and struggled and struggled and fought and fought so in my sleep several nights in a row!  I just didn’t have any peace nor did I feel rested.

Sometimes, things can get so heavy that one feels convinced that all is lost and that a matter has finished its course and is well…dead.  For a few weeks now, my heart had been heavy and I even heard myself asking – WHAT THE HECK IS REALLY GOING ON that matters seem so bleak?

I went back to my petitions to the Lord.  And as the year moved closer to the end and my rest was further disturbed I felt the best place for me was in the house of the Lord (smile).  And it was with bittersweet joy I entered into the house of the Lord (maybe sometime I will be able to put into words what it was like watching an era come to a close).  I also heard echoes of my Grandfather and other dear friends that have moved over to glory, within the walls, which added to my melancholy (nice word huh). 

Then in the midst of all this I got my annual upper respiratory infection.  So, I had more time to contemplate the “meaning” of things and what thus said the Lord. 

Believe it or not, I’ve always thought that I know the real truth about some things (smile).  You’ll be pleased to know that with age has come some restraint and I’ve learned that just because I think I know the truth doesn’t mean it’s mine to tell.

Okay, okay, okay, what am I talking about?  Well, I’m going to have to tell what I believe is the truth in order to bring this conversation home – so let us agree upfront to disagree if you don’t see this matter the way I see – Okay?

That night, in the house of the Lord, I heard two good words.  I’m only going to share one today.  The scripture centered on Matthew 25:1-13; the 10 Virgins.  For the sake of this conversation (and the fact that I’m nobody’s teacher), let us refer to this as the parable of the wise and the foolish; SOMEBODY BETTER SAY SOMETHING.  (Now as an aside, I’ve always wondered how the wise ones could justify not helping the foolish – but I’ll ask my childhood Sunday School Teacher this one.  I’m sure she’ll set my mind straight – smile.) 

The truth according to Toi

So many of us are very blessed and greatly favored by God himself.  However, we walk around like oppressed people.  As my dear friend would say, “like we’ve been sucking on lemons.”  I’m shamed before the Lord to admit it but I too am guilty of this very same thing!

God has made a way for some of us out of nothing.  Instead of walking in the freedom and Grace he’s provided – we keep looking back and complaining about what was!

As I lay around working through my annual respiratory infection – I had the nerve to act like I was at the end of my life.  I told my mother I was just so miserable and she told me I was making everyone else miserable and to go to bed.  It amounted to a cold – and I was acting like a jackass while others are dealing with REAL LIFE THREATENING ILLNESSES – SBTL!

Some of us have received mercy on top of mercy and show absolutely no mercy towards the next person.  WE SHOULD BE SBTL!  And while we’re behaving this way, the next generation – our children- watch our behavior and we have the nerve to wonder what the matter with these kids is?   

There is a scene in Barber Shop 2 that I just love.  It’s the scene where the community is rioting and the guy comes to the barber shop to burn it.  Cedric the Entertainer’s character is at every window and door the man comes to saying one simple thing – “NO.” 

Through the course of my contact with my comrades, I heard a piece of wisdom that I’d like to share with you:  Can you love more than you hate?

Now it is with some trepidation I declare the following (cause God always holds me accountable and I don’t always want to comply):  I’m going to endeavor to live better so I don’t have to be so SBTL; to stand in the gaps and just say “no;” and to love more than I hate. 

Will you join me? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9td6ZZuTbsk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFtf0WJc3i0&feature=related