THE COOK'S KITCHEN

There is this on-going joke between me and my mother affectionately known as “the cook’s kitchen.”  I really am captivated by kitchen gadgets.  I can spend long periods of time in that isle in every store I go to.  I also love to daydream over these items in the various magazines I receive.  I keep a little list of “things” that I might like for my Christmas/Year Round list so my family knows what I want and can purchase said items for the various holidays we observe. 

Sometimes my mother adds to the gadgets.  Sometimes she challenges the cook of “The Cook’s Kitchen.”  See, the joke is – I’m really nobody’s cook.  I JUST LIKE THE GADGETS (I like tools too and I don’t fix much either – smile)! 

So, the other night I was talking with my friend.  She asked what I was doing and I told her I was studying a recipe (yep the latest challenge for “The Cook’s Kitchen”).  She liked the idea and wished she had such a challenge.  I promised her I would email the damn thing to her once I CONQURRED the challenge. 

In my stress, I went on to explain to her the EVIL little challenges received periodically from my mother either designed to force me to demonstrate some twisted sort of love for her (who asks a non cook to cook) or because ….. HEY, this is my blog so let’s stick with my version of this story – just plain everyday TORTURE!  I went on and on to my poor friend about my predicament – “I could just say no, I could act like I misplaced the book, I could ….. do what I usually do when these situations arise (except for sewing – she can’t get me that way anymore) just do it cause if I saw something in a book and wanted her to make it she would make it for me (you see the double bind of interpersonal relationships).” 

We also had to discuss the lemon zest as I traveled down memory lane (dragging her with me) about the first time I encountered lemon zest in a recipe and how I hadn’t been smart enough to consider grating the lemon prior to cutting to get the juice; and the knuckle busting adventure that had turned into!  I went on and on about the conversation with my Great-Aunt (cause I told her we could go into business making lemon zest as I had no idea lemon zest was – SOLD IN THE STORES) and how she was kind enough to just listen to my kitchen woes. 

Okay, I already had been to the store and had all necessary ingredients in house for the challenge.  All I needed was a little more study time and some peace and quiet to pull off the perfect product. 

The little peeps (NO WAY could I add their assistance to my stressful challenge) took a rest break and I was already on top of the laundry – surely this was the moment.  I started by putting all the necessary items in separate containers (I was going to be sure that I didn’t miss any this time).  I had to sacrifice 6 eggs to get what I needed from 4 of them (even used The Cook’s Kitchen unique and technical procedure for separating the white matter out of the egg – via a fork). 

 I began as the directions indicated but lo and behold I paused my whisking to make sure I had a few other things set up and ready to go.  When I looked back in my pot – my time for all that whisking was over and the mixture LOOKED the right consistency.  I mixed and stirred with my middle niece coming in to offer me some moral support as I mumbled, growled, cheered, sweated, swore but eventually completed the challenge and moved to place the finished product in the oven for 15 minutes.

Just as I had moved on to cook our evening meal, a sister/friend stopped over to the house.  She rounded the corner into the kitchen and spied the finished challenge product.  “You know how to make lemon meringue pie?”  Now, I’m sure the look on my face was most curious because I really didn’t know how to answer for I had in fact made a “lemon meringue pie” but WHO COULD VOUCH FOR TASTE? 

   

So, I presented my mother with the pie.  At first she seemed surprised and pleased, but then she began to look skeptical (yeah, she knew a tasting would be necessary).  She wanted to know if it was real meringue on top cause she told me she didn’t want real meringue – “oh no that wasn’t you I told.” 

I just let that all wash over me and cut her a small piece.  She appeared to have eaten the whole piece but declined to take the rest of her pie with her to work the following day. 

If you don’t use eggs WHAT THE HECK do you use for meringue?  “She’s killing me softly,” I screamed in my mind.

I didn’t pass the challenge after all!  Not to worry!  I’ve learned from the years of being put through this particular wringer; I always get enough supplies to do these little projects twice.  And, I called in my backup weapon; my other Great-Auntie who is known for making fabulous lemon meringue pies (I know her secret ingredient from observation). 

We kicked my dilemma around and guess what – everything changes.  I described the ingredient we’d discussed previously and she told me to get a box kit.  Different states offer different things – so I got cans of lemon pie filling. 

Now all I had left was to figure out an eggless meringue.  I kicked around whipped marsh mellows because I figured it would “brown.”  But I and all consulted agreed that probably wouldn’t stand up.   The only other thing I could think of was Cool Whip – she likes Cool Whip. 

But first I checked the WWW to see if I could find an eggless meringue.  NOPE!  Then I got a little frustrated and text her and her reply was….. Cool Whip. 

I put the pie filling in the pre-baked (not homemade) pie crust and heated in the oven.  When that cooled I put the whip on top and served it to her.  She liked the way the pie looked and she liked the way the pie tasted.  She even liked the pie pan (“oh so the cook’s kitchen has real pie pans?”).  Ughhhhhhhhhhh………

Ahhhhh…. I WAS SUCESSFUL WITH THE PIE CHALLENGE - AT LAST!!!!!!

Pie #1



Pie #2