HOME REPAIRS

All three of my parents are very talented.  You would think that the “apple doesn’t fall far from the tree” but I’m 45 years old now and I’ve yet to find said talent in myself.  Over the last couple of years, I’ve tried to be more independent in terms of solving household snafus and planning projects. 

I have a list of things per room that need to be done and that I would like to get done.  I slowly accumulate the necessary parts for the “projects” and proceed from there.   For whatever crazy reason – I determined that I needed to complete said projects myself.    

I once attended a class at Lowes on how to put up a ceiling fan.  They even gave me a gadget to test voltage.  My mother had tagged along and asked the teacher why he was trying to get her “baby electrocuted.”  I made note of that statement and determined – without personally testing the theory – that she was probably right and never attempted work with electricity. 

But I did try cement.  I will tell you this about that project;  if the instructions indicate that the cement will set quickly – believe them; do the project before the sun is beating down on that side of the house; if you don’t know how to smooth cement out – don’t do the project!  I could have asked my son-in-law.  He works with the stuff daily but NOOOOOOO, I wanted to do the job myself.  The cement steps that cracked every year and had to be patched over and over haven’t cracked since my handy job of “fixing” them and one must be careful to not trip over the little lump on the porch right in front of the door (no way around stepping on it). 

I finally finished scraping the bathroom ceiling.  Who needs a moon roof in the bathroom?  The one in ours sprung a leak a few years back and they don’t make that size anymore.  There was a handy man that knew how to fix it and for $150 the job was done.  It hasn’t leaked since but the popcorn ceiling needed to be scrapped, sanded and painted.  I bought a special gadget to do the scrapping but when I finally had the energy to do it – I couldn’t locate the gadget so I had to work with another tool.  What an awful job and a terrible mess to clean up.  I got it done, painted the bathroom and decorated it for the little peeps in my life (under their scrutiny only gaining their support and approval when they understood I was doing the work for them – you ever been judged by a 6, 5 & 3 y/o).

I’m still working on the dryer project – I’m feeling a little nervous about using my wire cutters.  I haven’t started stripping the cabinet I got from my grandmother’s house, nor have I finished looking into how to re-do the kitchen wood floor (I have an excellent book).  I would really like to be able to repair the sub-floor in the living room and bedrooms but thankfully our lifestyle won’t allow me to tear up the whole house for weeks/months on end. 

I won’t get into deep detail over the time I spray painted in the garage and broke out in a rash.  But I did later learn, after spray painting outside in the open and breaking out in a rash, that I’m apparently allergic to spray paint (not to mention how sore my hands were even with the spray can gadget). 

I probably shouldn’t give too much detail over my attempts to eradicate the ants at in the house and the coughing attack that ensued as the spray was just as dangerous to humans as it was for ants.  You probably don’t want to know about the time I had the bug man come over and despite me just trying to get the bottom line price – he insisted on telling me lots of gruesome things about bugs and other pests until I was itching and scratching all over.  Not to worry, I scratched and itched so much he too was doing the same thing when he left.        

I recently had some plumbing problems in the house.  Sticking to my resolve to learn to do things myself with the failure of a whole bottle of draino– I headed to the store for a few tools (in this situation tools should be pronounced as ta-oooo-z).  I needed a smaller plunger, and something to run down the drain to force whatever was causing the slow flow out of the way.  They had some really good gadgets in that aisle and I selected two along with the plunger.  I worked diligently but admitted defeat when the slow drainage turned to no drainage and called in My Dust to rescue me from myself. 

I’m not going to give you great detail on our dismay over the broken gadget, the 3 hour - I’ll be right back break or his great belly chuckle over where the water might be going since we weren’t sure the line was clear.  But I will tell you, true to form, My Dust fixed it and all drains are moving quickly now. 

Shortly after My Dust left, I received a text message from my mother (the new queen of text messaging) telling me to get myself a plumber in 2011 and not her husband.  I may not be nearly as talented as my three parents –  but I’m also not a dummy!

WHAT THE HECK IS SHE THINKING?  

I got that man on speed dial under

“My Dust the PLUMBER!”

Edited by Jill-O-Me